Observe the Ritual: Open House
It was my third year in a Montessori Elementary classroom. It was about ten in the morning, one November morning and the 9-12-year olds were so loud. I had spent so much energy trying to get them to follow up on the work from the lessons I had presented. I was emotionally and physically exhausted and slumped in a chair in the corner of the room, left with no option but to just observe them.
That’s when the magic happened.
The energy in the room went from frenzied to settled, in less than five minutes. I watched, as children who had resisted my ideas and insights explored the lessons through quiet conversations, detailed drawings, began games challenging one another to complete complicated math problems on various materials. For the first time that year, everyone was engaged and I was not a part of it. I was observing.
It wasn’t observation in the way we typically think of it—using my senses to gain information. This day, I was observing a ritual. I watched the children pursuing their relationships, while discussing formations of stars. I watched as they delved deep into their questions on their terms. In me, there was a distinct change, as if I was in a religious ceremony. My heart rate slowed, my breathing evened out, my mind cleared of the To Do list that constantly played on repeat. And I enjoyed the children.
Over the course of the next months in that class, they taught me so much about how to do childhood, how to do learning, and what adjustments I needed to make in my perspective.
As our children prepare work to demonstrate to you, this Thursday at Open House, I invite you to simply observe the ritual. The work the children are presenting to you follow a very specific process, designed to instruct the child by doing the process. This means that, most often, the child will not be able to answer questions about why they do certain steps. The material they are presenting is one that is not yet conceptualized. So, to ask them questions about what they are learning is inappropriate. They may not yet know. Additionally, questions or comments about their work—even positive ones—while they are working is distracting and will most likely derail their concentration.
It is so exciting to see the materials in action and, as adults, it is amazing to see really abstract concepts come to life in a form we can touch. Please remember: Any excitement we share with our children should be about the child’s work with the materials, not excitement about the concept or the material itself. Inevitably, when we talk about the how’s and why’s of the materials, we reveal the conclusion of the child’s work with the material. We steal from the child the joy of the discovery.
There is a joy we, as adults are allowed, when we commit to observing the ritual. The child’s individual development is so amazing unto itself. To see the unfolding of this part of this child’s life is their gift to us: Their revelation of their selfhood.
This Thursday, I invite you to see your child reveal their inner self. I promise you: This is the best gift they can offer you; the best gift Montessori has to offer. I promise: The academics will follow and reach heights you never even imagined. —Jen Stoll, Owner & Director